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My Overblown Entry To The Fall Contest. My First Real Site Interaction. Excuse me if I eff it up horribly. Please enjoy.
A "Short" Story involving anthropomorphic creatures during their exodus to a better land. In a nomadic society so honorable, not everything is written code and law, but how much are you willing to overlook when what you desire is all about you? How do you know what it is you truly desire until you have it? It's all about perception...
It's a much longer story than the rest of the entries, which is not a problem in itself, but makes it quite different in terms of rythm and structure. I've never read anything by the author, but I think the style could be leaner at times, especially during the first half (the reader does not need to be constantly reminded that Luna's bottom is attractive).
I really hated Lita (and I don't mean that I loved to hate her). If there's one type of character I cannot stand in fiction, it's the "unlikable and brattish female with no actual skill to back up her arrogance".
On the other hand, the tension felt by Luna before the contest is nicely expressed and I really enjoyed the two spankings. Having an humiliating experience become a pleasing and exciting one is a very nice idea and you pulled it off well.
I don;t know the original author personally, so it's hard for me to say that you indeed effed it up or not. xD Regardless, it was very well written and an entertaining read! I enjoyed the character development between the female and male lead. x3 Very sexy-fabulous and fun. Teehee. Nice job.
