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File Name: Second (69.5 KB) Download
Author: MR AZ (Uploaded by MR AZ)
Date Added: February 5th, 2010
Downloads: 69
Grade: Not Rated
Description
/Second one to my Haruka/Michiru's series (That begun with: First) , Haruka almost falls by her own trick, Michiru is not happy with that, please read and tell me your opinion .
Warning: Yuri/
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Comments
iconoclast
February 11th, 2010 at 04:30 AM
There are some really nice touches in this installment. I like the scenario and the characters. Your note at the end mentions that you considered including a scene where the red-haired girl approached Haruka. I think you did the right thing by leaving it out. That part was easy enough to imagine through the flashback you provided, while actually putting it in would have made the story a little long and cumbersome.

You also mentioned that you were concerned about being too repetitive when using words like "girl" and "blond" to describe the characters. I didn't notice that when I was reading the story, but a good way to mix things up is to use a thesaurus.

I'd love to read a Third, especially if it touches a little on their professional lives. Not too much, just a little to remind us that they're Sailor Scouts instead of just two ordinary women? Anyways, I look forward to seeing what you'll come up with next.


DownloadsII 5.1.2 by CyberRanger & Jelle
Based on ecDownloads 4.1 © Ronin

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