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I really liked this story. Its sweet and playful, yet very clearly erotic. Yuri through and through. I only have a passing familiarity with the characters from Sailor Moon, so it'll be up to those more versed in the series to decide how close you came to capturing the personalities of Neptune and Uranus. All I know is that a story like this, that stimulates the libido and warms the heart, is a pleasure to read.
For your future endeavors, I highly recommend a writing program that has a built in spell check, like Microsoft Windows Word Processor. I don't know how I'd get by without mine. Either that or have somebody proofread for you. You've shown you can come up with a good idea and develop it into a coherent and entertaining story. Eliminate the spelling errors and you'll elevate your writing to an even more professional level.
