"Well it looks like a certain little baby could use a nap huh?" Peter asked when Stiles weakly aimed a hit at him, it didn't really go his way and he ended up putting his legs up into the perfect diapering position, maybe not for pull ups but it had the desired effect. "What a good baby, lifting those legs up for Daddy." he praised, grabbing his face and giving his chubby cheek a little tug of affection.
Peter eased off Stiles' boxers and threw them aside, "There we, go oh dear..." he paused and tilted his head. "Wait here." he said, knowing Stiles wouldn't be able to stand up from the effect of the drug yet. Peter returned with some shaving cream and a razor. "Babies don't have all this hair on their legs and...little bits." he tutted, rubbing the cream all over his lower body.
"Let's get you baby smooth huh?" he smiled, bringing the razor to his leg hair firstly.
********
Lucifer knew God wasn't purposely ignoring him, he didn't blame Daddy of course, he blamed all the stupid humans who weren't worth his Daddy's time! He disappeared to Jerusalem and hid his wings before using his dark power to conjure up illness on the humans. He cackled wickedly as the newly blind stumbled around and the leprosy contaminated sobbed and begged for the Lord God to save them.
"How path-" he looked up when the sky grew dark and stormy and he suddenly felt a tingling in his bottom. Uh oh.
He jumped when God himself appeared beside him and demanded to know what he was doing. "Oh um...just teaching the humans about pain and suffering, you know like...the hardships caused by Eve's decision to eat the apple."
Which had been HIS fault of course.
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If you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.
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