Learning to be a daughter (For La Fay)

[Sadao]

Seven year old Arya Mitchell was sitting in the otherwise empty group bedroom of the local orphanage. She sighed as she starred out the window and watched the traffic outside. She silently wonder how it would be if she could just pack her things and go wherever she wanted... The little girl was tired of being sent from one orphanage to the next, only to find out that she wasn’t welcome anywhere, really. They all had provided her with a bed and meals and so on but what they’d all lacked what she really craved for – a loving atmosphere. She briefly wondered how it would be to have someone that actually gave a damn about her. A wry smile reached her lip at the mere thought. Her own mother hadn’t been able to love her, had preferred to hit her among other things. The woman had been nothing but abusive... So how in the world would anyone else ever be able to be affectionate toward her?

No, she much preferred not to dwell on such painful and rather unsettling thoughts. Tearing her gaze away from the street outside the home, Arya stood up and dragged her feet as she left the room. Perhaps spending some time with the other children would lift her spirits? Slowly she made her way outside where the other kids were playing. Most of them were engaged in playing tag at the moment and while Arya wished to join them and had a little fun, too, she found herself rooted in place. The problem was a simple one, she didn’t know how to approach them or how to talk to them... She’d come to the orphanage two months ago and, until now, she hadn’t found the courage to actually speak to the other kids. Thus, she hadn’t made any friends yet. Bemoaning her shyness, Arya sat down on the grass and watch the other kids playing. She twirled a strand of her long black her around her index finger, it was a nervous habit. But she hoped that if she managed to calm down her nerves some, she might dredge up enough courage to go play and enjoy herself too.

[La Fay]

It was a bright sunny day in a quiet town, as a young woman who looked to be in her early twenties made her way down the street towards the town orphanage.

She had a slim figure and long black hair, dressed in a pair of worn blue jeans with stylized rips in her thighs and right knee, as a top she wore a black loose hanging vest shirt with a white faded skull on it with a white heart shape in its right eye with small stars around it. with long fingerless black glove sleeves that went from below her armpits to around the middle of her hands with a hole for her thumbs, showing off her grey painted fingernails, wearing a thin choker and a hanging small black cross on a silver chain, with a stud and small hoop earring in both her ears, and a red beanie hat on her head.

She smiled excitedly as she walked towards the orphanage, she had recently just been approved for her adoption application, having been out of her higher education for two years with a steady paying job and a safe home. She was considered the perfect applicant for adopting a child.

Her name was Elizabeth Stone, though her friends called her Izzy, the Local graphics designer and generally creative person in all ways, from writing to photography she did it all and ran her studio out of her home doing commissioned requests while keeping up with the work from the larger companies who used her for their runoff work that needed doing.

Making her way up the steps just off the street Izzy made her way into the orphanage and went to greet the orphanage Matron who was there already to greet her, she approached with a warm smile on her face.

“Hello ma’am, my name’s Elizabeth Stone, I believe we spoke on the phone yesterday about my visit” Izzy introduced herself to the kind looking matron as she reached out and shook her hand.

[Sadao]

The matron Izzy was addressing had been just about to head outside herself to check on the children seeing as their play could get a little rough from time to time. She smiled when she noted the woman who had called out to her before she eventually introduced herself as Elizabeth Stone. “Ah, miss Stone, I’m Martha Clearly and yes, we spoke on the phone yesterday.” Shaking the young woman’s hand, she continued speaking. “I hope your drive here was a pleasant one? However, the children are outside on the orphanages’ playground. Perhaps you want to get to watch and talk to them for a little while? After all, adopting a child comes with great responsibility. You should be absolutely sure you found the right kid for you.” Gesturing for her to follow her, the matron led Izzy outside.

The children were still unaware that they were having a guest. That was most of them were unaware of the fact, save for Arya. Since she wasn’t playing with the others, she had spotted Izzy almost immediately. Her interest was certainly piqued as they didn’t have someone to come to visit the orphanage every day. Carefully, she approached her, eyeing her suspiciously as if seizing her up. After a long moment of simply staring at Izzy, the little girl eventually gave a derisive snort. “Let me guess, you’re just having a look around and are already about to leave again, right?” she said, sounding anything but polite.

“Arya!” the matron immediately rebuked her, “That’s very rude! I expect you to apologize.” Turning to Izzy the matron offered her an apologetic smile. “I’m really sorry, miss Stone. I’m sure she didn’t mean it like that.”

Arya, though, wasn’t about to say sorry. “Why would I apologize? It’s not as if anyone coming here would ever have genuine intentions,” she insisted stubbornly.

[La Fay]

After following Martha out into the playground, Izzy’s gaze settled on the children playing her smile grew slightly as she recalled memories of her own childhood in an orphanage much like this, though it all hadn’t been good she had a number of fond memories of her childhood, and it was through that desire to give such a pleasant childhood to those who were as unfortunate as her to have lost their parents.

It was after only a few moments that Izzy spotted the young girl watching them, seperate from the other children, much like she had been in her own childhood, always more content to be lost in her sketch pad than playing with the other children.

She watched as the young girl approached but kept her gaze wide watching all the children trying not to show any direct interest, she wanted the girl to be the one to make the first move, she could see that she would want to from how she was looking at her, though the snort and rather rude comment wasn’t what she was expecting.

Izzy smiled to Martha and shook her head, “it’s alright ma’am I’m not offended” she said before looking to the small girl once more. “Arya was it?” she asked as she knelt down to talk to her at her eye level, “What makes you say something like that dear, I know I’m not the first to come to adopt from here, and surely many children get successfully adopted over time, so I’m curious as to why you would say those who come here don’t have genuine intentions?”

[Sadao]

Given that practically no one, not even her biological mother, had ever spare her a second glance, it was only natural that Arya didn’t trust adults easily. She was certain that most if not all of them had ulterior motives. That thinking had also led her to be rather rude toward Izzy when she’d originally addressed her. She didn’t believe that the was was truly here because she wanted to about any of the children.

That she was rebuked by the matron for her behavior didn’t change her attitude at all. In fact, when Izzy knelt down on her level, Arya was tempted to scoff. She settled for narrowing her eyes, however, and looked the woman up and down. She rolled her eyes when asked why she was convinced that people who came here didn’t have genuine intentions. “Even if I told you, you wouldn’t understand,” she replied testily. “You’ll never know how it feels to see people come and go, sometimes even taking children with them, but it’ll never be you.” Over the years, Arya had almost lost all hope to ever have a family herself. “So, lady, why don’t you just to back to where you came from!?” she yelled at Izzy before turning tail and running back inside the orphanage. Already exchanging this few words with her had worked the child up. She had felt tears sting her eyes but wouldn’t allow herself to cry in front of a woman that didn’t care the least bit about her anyway.

Arya had retreated to the dining hall to try and get her emotions in check. Though she wasn’t able to hold back the tears and she cried quietly, feeling profoundly alone.

Meanwhile outside, Martha had once more apologized to Izzy. “I’m really sorry. Arya is pretty new here. That poor little thing had never been adopted by anyone, that’s why her outburst,” she explained. “However, I would like to introduce you to Ben. He’s a really sweet three years old boy. Plus, he isn’t nearly a handful as Arya.”

[La Fay]

After hearing Arya’s outburst and then watching her run away, the start of tears in her eyes, had touched something in Izzy that made her frown just a little, unbeknownst to Arya Izzy did indeed know exactly how what she had said felt those same pains when she was her age, watching kids come and go from the orphanage time and time again, wishing that it was her. She could see herself more and more in the young girl with every passing moment.

When Martha apologies once more for Arya’s outburst and then try to steer her to another child, Izzy shook her head, “Actually if you don’t mind, I think I’m going to go and talk with young Arya a little more, she might be a handful, but then again the ones who are often have a reason for being so” she said with a smile, “I know a thing or two about that, I was one.” she said before starting off after the young girl.

Following where she had seen Arya go, Izzy made her way into the dinning hall and looked around inside and followed the sound of muffled crying and soon found where it was coming from, Arya sat at one of the tables with her head in her arms as she cried into them.

Izzy made her way over as quietly as she could coming up on the girl gently stopping a few feet away from the table before speaking, “dear are you alright?” she asked concerned for the girl.

[Sadao]

While Arya was relieved to be alone for a little moment after her emotional outburst, she couldn’t help but wish that someone would come after her. It would be nice to know that, at least for once, someone would care about how she was feeling. But chances were that after their guest had left the matron would merely scold her for her behavior.

Resigned to that very fact, she rested her head in her arms on a table and cried. She felt silly that she was being so weak and couldn’t rein her tears in. She didn’t much like being such a crybaby. As if to make the situation even more embarrassing, she then heard Izzy address her, asking if she was alright. Arya didn’t look up at the woman but forced herself to answer, her voice a little hoarse, “I’m fine. Just leave me alone...”

Much to her surprise, though, Izzy didn’t leave. And that eventually caused her to lift her head and wipe away her tears with the heel of her hand. “Why are you here anyway? Aren’t there enough other kids out there for you to ‘inspect’?” She tried to sound sardonic but didn’t quite manage it. And so she sounded just as lost and miserable as she truly felt.

[La Fay]

Izzy just lightly smiled as she shook her head, "No, not at the moment." she said lightly as she came over and sat down opposite the small girl, "I'd like to talk with you actually, I can tell that you need someone to talk to, someone who will understand." she said gently.

"you remind me a lot of myself when I was your age, I was an orphan as well, I grew up in a home much like this," Izzy said as she indicated to the orphanage, "spent my days in my room drawing because I didn't want to go out and make friends with the other children because chances were they would be adopted and gone, and I would be all alone again" she explained.

[Sadao]

Arya watched Izzy closely as she came to her and took a seat at the table. She would have never assumed that the woman would really want to talk with her. She had just thought that she would leave the matter be and simply carry on. But apparently that wasn’t to be the case. What took the little girl off guard was when Izzy claimed that she understood. At that Arya gave her a puzzled look but didn’t interrupt her while she explained.

“Sooo...” Arya said at length, “...you really know what it’s like to be stuck in an orphanage?” she asked disbelieving. Deciding to be honest with Izzy, she added, “I don’t wanna make friends with anyone here because I’m scared they’ll be adopted and I’ll be all alone again... Say... have you been adopted at one point?” It was a genuine question as Arya wanted to find out for herself why Izzy felt like adopting a child.

[La Fay]

Izzy smiled and nodded, "I was, four times, three of those didn't work out, they were all first timer. And I was still quite young, they had the idea in their head what they wanted their, daughter, me, to be like, smart, pretty, a good athlete, when they found out I wasn't their ideal of those things I got sent back," she said frowning slightly and sighed, "Hurt more and more each time, though I got lucky on the fourth time with a good mom" she smiled, "strict but very loving and passionate about her work and me" she said with a fondness in her voice.