Why?

[greyrain]

When me and my girlfriend first got into spanking I realized something about myself that I had never known.

I never vent anything. I take everything in and bottle it up and it never gets let out. I can never just let go. Some people bottle things up until they explode, but I don't explode.

There was this period of time that lasted about four months and towards the end of it I was getting horribly depressed. Because of all this stuff we had going on in our life me and my girlfriend never had time to do anything together. Which meant no spanking, no sex, no anything really. Before that I ended up being spanked on a fairly regular basis when we'd play and it wasn't until I was without it that I realized just how much I needed it. I realized that I never had let go like that before. I had never been so at peace with everything. I mean yesterday I got spanked and I'm still floating around with this huge grin on my face. It's amazing how theraputic being spanked is for me. We since worked out this code where if I need spanked for whatever reason I put a hairbrush in the shower. And it works wonderfully.

It's not the only thing I get out of spanking, but it is THE reason I enjoy it so much. I thought most people did it because it was arousing (which it totally is) or because they enjoy the power play and things of that nature but I never really knew that I could get out of it what I do. So my question is why do you like being spanked? What do you get out of it?

[bobby]

The "Why?" is a very interesting question, and one that I've been thinking about for the past few years. For me it's a tangled complication of things. First of all, it's definitely about power play and the fact that I get very excited when I'm 'taken under control' by a dominant person.

Somehow, I've come to associate that control with an intimate caring, and spanking with a particularly intense form of that intimacy. Putting someone in your lap and taking down their pants is so very intimate that it's hard to believe that someone would do it to someone they couldn't stand. The body you put in your lap, (at least in my mind) is a body you love enough to take the time, and engage in the closeness, to spank.

Interestingly, unlike many other spankees, I don't get off on the pain at all. I get off on all other aspects, but the pain is something I must endure in order to get all the other stimulation. Therefore, when I'm spanked, it's almost always a genuine punishment mixed with the thrill of the close contact and control. I also always need it to be a 'real' spanking, which means I get spanked good and hard, usually to tears.

I love the person who spanks me, so for me it's an easy price to pay.

[Lakot]

Why?

I have no idea.

I've realized this fetish for years and I still have no clue why I have it or what I get out of it. I'm a colassal wimp that hates pain, so i don't like that part. And i don't like hurting people so i doubt i could ever spank, even if the spankee was willing. And as for the sex aspect its nonexisitent. I've never even done, er, "Fun things" with myself, and i'm a freshman in college.

So, in all honesty i'm still figuring it out

[Mushy]

Hmm...*thinks hard*

I know some of the reason I'm into spanking, but it's probably a bit disturbing to say it. All I know, is from the waist below, those are my privates, and getting touched on the lower bottom has DEEP significance for setting off my libido.

However, I like the pain factor a little bit... Though my pain tolerance is very, very low. I can take piercings, likely tattooes (haven't had one yet though), so why can't I take spankings? Though as soon as breaking skin or bones is involved, I call it quits! I like the reminding tingling afterwards...and crude as I am, not being able to sit does remind me of having sex so hard I can't sit. ^^;

The spanking itself can be conducted in an erotic setting or a disciplinary setting. I like disciplinary the best, and don't mind add-ons like cornertime, mouthsoaping, and damn do I love ear pulling! However, sometimes I don't want my partner to treat me like his arrogant charge. I just want a spanking for fun, given slowly and deliberately with the intention of pleasing me.

So really, when it comes down to it, it's probably all very sexual for me. ^^;

[Barbossasdaughter]

I agree with you grairain. I got also hard times and spanking...well I don't get spanked but just writing about it or drawing, is also a very good therapy. if I didn't write about it a time or let my stress out with it. I become very sad. Even depressiv.

[ellipsis39]

Yes, to me it is both a great tension reliever AND intensely erotic! My guy and I now recognize two types of spankings, the first the erotic type and the second the therapeutic. The former should be self-explanatory; it's meant for arousal before sex and is generally light and fast and tingly.

The latter occurs because I am naturally high-strung and I get too tightly wound on occasion. When that happens I can ask him for, or he can suggest, a therapy spanking for purposes of "unwinding" me. These are typically quite hard, and I need to cry. It's very mind-clearing and afterward all the fuzz is gone out of my brain and I see what is truly important and what isn't. The tears seem to literally wash away any guilt and tension feeings. Sex may or may not happen after a therapy spanking, most often not.