Hokage's Orders

[Croup]

(for League of Spankers)

Tsunade ground her teeth as she looked over the reports.

Outrageous.

Lee had gotten drunk and trashed a local bar. Kiba and his dog were refusing to apologize for 'dynamically marking' all over the village square. Konohamaru was cutting his classes. And Naruto was back to painting graffiti all over Kanoha. And that was only the first page of the report!

She sighed and cradled her head. Practically every genin in the village was picking this week to run amuck. Ordinarily it wouldn't be a problem--she'd simply assign their regular sensei to take care of these discipline problems. But this was the same week an urgent crisis had popped up in a neighboring country, requiring her to send most of the reserve Jounin out on missions. There was literally no one left to punish the genin appropriately.

No one, except for...

She looked up. Would that work?

Shikamaru was young--in fact the same age as the ones causing trouble. And yet, he was also an entire rank higher than they were and had proven himself an effective leader already. Could she really trust him to...?

Pursing her lips, she took out her quill and dabbed it into the ink.

As a Chuunin, Shikamaru was going to have to get used to troublesome missions anyway. She was doing him a favor still easing him into them. Besides, somebody had to do it and she couldn't spare anyone else.

So it was that Shikamaru received a scroll early the next morning detailing a list of petty crimes his friends had all committed, where to locate them around the village, and... the exact number of sound, bare-bottom swats to give their twisting butts, and with what implements.

The order, methods, and means of capture were all, however, left completely up to him.

[League of Spankers]

'This is going to be a real drag.'

That was what Shikamaru thought as he sat outside the Hokage tower. His newest mission assignment sitting in his lap as he read out his orders, despite just hearing them come out of Lady Tsunade's mouth.

The old hag was telling him to spank the naked asses of his best friends. Not only his best friends either. But his fellow classmates! Most of the people on this list were guys he had grown up with and got in trouble with during their years at the Academy.

This was going to be a real pain in the ass.

"At least she gave me the implements I need for this...." Shikamaru could feel the sealing scroll containing the needed 'tools' in his chunin vest pocket. Having to get them himself would have been annoying.

He was going to go and visit Choji first. The pudgy shinobi was his best friend and he knew that the bigger boy would never make a fuss for him.

Before leaving to find Choji, he made sure to remember what implement had to go for each boy. As well as the number of swats he would need to give.

(Is Sasuke on this list? Or is he gone like in cannon at this point? If the RP is all about spanking the other genin. It would make sense to have Sasuke still around by making a canon divergence. Unless you prefer to keep things strictly canon.)

[Croup]

(definitely okay with canon divergences to give us the max number possible of naughty guys! I was thinking Kankuro might be on the list too)

"Itadakimasu!"

Choji was in the midst of chowing down, as usual. A plethora of junk food, candy bars, chips, and crackers surrounded him. With Asuma-sensei away for the week, he'd happily gone completely off his diet. It wasn't a big deal, he figured. He would just diet extra hard once his sensei returned... right? Right.

Going off diet wasn't the reason Choji had a spanking coming though. Oh no. It was nothing so plain as that. While practicing with his clan's multi-size technique, he'd accidentally used it too close to an ANBU station, then tripped and fell backwards. He had, in effect, accidentally sat on the place with his enormous ass. The result had been some not-inconsiderable damage to the building. He'd been so embarrassed he'd run away when the senior ninjas had come out to lecture him.

That had been a few days ago though. By now he'd forgotten all about the incident. The big Akimichi was completely unaware punishment was finally coming his way... in the form of his best friend in the village.

[League of Spankers]

Shikamaru knew where he would find Choji without needing to take a second glance at the mission scroll. Ever since they were small children, Shikamaru and Choji had used the roof of this building as their hang out spot. There were a lot of fond memories of Shikamaru spending hours up there with Choji. He would watch the clouds and Choji would be there with him eating on his bag of chips and just shooting the breeze with each other.

Now a new, less pleasant memory was going to be made up there. Sticking his hands into his pockets, Shikamaru lazily walked up the side of the building using his chakra to stick his feet to the surface of the concrete wall.

Reaching the top, Shikamaru jumped over the protective railing and landed on the balls of his feet to find his best friend snacking on candy and junk food. "Choji? What's all this?" Shikamaru asked curiously as his eyes swept over the carnage in front of him. "Having a little snack huh?" A hint of disappointment carried in his tone.

It didn't take a genius to ell that Choji had broken his diet set forth by Asuma-Sensei.

[Croup]

"Huh? Oh, hey Shika. Yeah, I figured with Asuma-sensei away what's the harm in indulging a little." The big guy scratched one of the swirls on his cheeks and grinned. Then he held out a bag. "Want some chips? I think I got some barbecue flavor around here for ya. And there's plenty of extra!"

He patted the spot next to him, urging Shikamaru to sit. "It's been a while since we got to hang out up here. It seems like ever since you passed the Chuunin Exams you've been in extra training or extra missions. It's okay, I won't tell anybody if you wanna sneak in a break." He winked at him. They'd had an understanding with each other since they were kids. The rest of the world might give them a hassle, but they never pressured each other. Up on the roof, they could just be themselves.

[League of Spankers]

Shikamaru sighed and shrugged his shoulders with a small smile. He couldn't be mad at Choji for breaking his diet. Heck, he didn't want to be an authority figure to Choji in the first place, but this mission Tsunade gave him was all but forcing him to be one. "Sure, thanks Choji." Walking over to the spot Choji had patted, Shika sat down and took some chips from the bag and crunched on them.

"Yeah, you could say that. It's been a real drag." Bemoaned Shikamaru as he pulled his knee to his chest and looked up at the clouds.

Oh, how he wished he could be a cloud right now. Without any responsibilities and duties, just floating in the sky peacefully. "Lady Tsunade gave me a mission today. I really don't like it at all Choji. But I got to do it."

Shika hung his head in defeat as he grabbed the mission scroll from his pouch. "I know I can trust you. So I figured you should know everything I have to do today." Shikamaru held out the mission scroll to his best friend. His chakra was ready to activate his shadow possession jutsu if he needed it. But he knew Choji. He wouldn't make things worse for him then they all ready were.

[Croup]

Chouji took the scroll curiously, not used to being to trusted with that sort of privileged information. He scanned it line by line. "Huh? But this is a list of disciplinary crimes guys have done all around the village. I recognize a few of them, especially Naruto's." He gave a light chuckle at the mention of the blond's newest graffiti masterpiece. "Asuma gets a scroll like this sometimes. Y'know, on the days one of has, uhh... earned..." He didn't finish the sentence. Both of them knew they did time kicking over their sensei's knee with their pants down every so often. Then Chouji's eyebrows furrowed. "But why would you have a scroll like...?"

Comprehension slowly dawned on him, and then he rapidly read further, hunting for something specific. He soon found it. There was his own name, underlined like all the others, and with a number of strokes by it. He worked his mouth as he set the scroll down. "So uhh... I guess I was your first stop, then?" he asked, unsure of what else to say. He knew and trusted Shikamaru like a brother. He didn't know why his friend been selected for this kind of assignment, but he figured it was already going to be hard enough for him with the number of names he'd seen. He didn't want to add to Shikamaru's burden and make his job more difficult.

And yet... it wasn't like he wanted Shikamaru to spank him either!

[League of Spankers]

Shikamaru could feel himself blush as Choji reminded him of all the times Asuma-Sensei would drag them over his big burly lap. God, it was humilating to just think about being spanked like some little kid. And Asuma-Sensei knew how to use that big, calloused hand of his to get all the reactions he wanted out of them too.

He did take consolation in the fact that he and Choji both got spanked the least compared to their other classmates. (Kiba and Naruto seemed to be tied with how often they would get spanked. And gossip like that could spread through the village faster than a forest fire.)

"Yeah...I have the unfortunate job of spanking everyone since the Sensei are out of the village. I figured that the least I could do was warn you. And do it someplace private where it can stay just between us." Shikamaru scratched the back of his head with a small smile as he chuckled.

"The other's are going to make me work for it, I already know that. And I just wouldn't have the energy to give them their licks in private, like I can with you." Shikamaru said in a fake exaggerated tone. He smirked and gave Choji a small wink.

(What? Did you think he wouldn't get any enjoyment out of this? Just because he was a lazy bum didn't mean he wouldn't get a small kick at being able to whoop the asses of his friends. Sasuke Uchiha's butt was one he was most eager to spank. Along with Neji Hyuuga's. Both were pretty big jerks in their own rights.)

Taking back the scroll of Choji, he put it back away in his pouch. "I also had another reason to come see you first Choji." Shikamaru got up to his feet with a grunt. "The less work I got to do the better, and you have more manpower than I do. So I'll cut you a deal, just because we're best friends. You help me by being my assistant on this mission. And I'll share half the pay I get, do your spanking last, and I'll even treat you to some barbeque. So, what do you say?"

[Croup]

Now Chouji was even more startled. He'd been assuming Shikamaru had visited him first because he'd give the least resistance to what he had coming. But now it turned out to be some sort of master plan on Shikamaru's part, recruiting him as an ally to help get the others. Not only did that mean he'd get to work closely with his best friend for a mission, but, well... he'd get to help spank all the other guys. How often could you say that?

And boy did most of them deserve it.

Chouji's chest swelled with pride. The mention of barbecue only enticed him more.

"Are you kidding? That sounds great! Between the two of us, we'll definitely be able to give the others exactly what they need! We've always been a great team," Chouji said eagerly, already imagining pants coming down and butts turning red. He smiled big and wide, now sharing in his friend's secret. He almost didn't even mind his own spanking would follow everyone else's, because now it would be worth it. "So who should we get first? All these guys have it coming."

[League of Spankers]

Offering out his hand, Shikamaru was willing to help his best friend up. "I knew I could count on you Choji. You never let me down." Patting Choji on the back, Shikamaru made sure that the mission scroll was secure in his Chunin vest. The last thing he needed was it getting stolen or lost. One of the key elements for completing this mission was the use of their surprise advantage.

Even with Choji's help, if the cat got out of the bag about the fellas being on this spanking list. All of them would scatter and try to hide. And Tsunade made it clear that if the Jounin-Sensei came back before he could complete his mission. Then he was going to get his butt toasted for failing to complete his duties.

He could not fail this mission. "The easiest target on the list is Konohamaru. So I want to handle that brat first. Sound good Choji?"