You Make Me A Better Villain (for Crooked)

[VGKforever]

"I'm trying, babe, but every time I get up, I get--AAAGH!" Harley took a second nosedive, bumping her head on the ground. "...G-Get the vertigo... ughhh..."

Wonder Woman nodded, but did not look up from her work. The leaves forming Ivy's pants were now breaking down, leaving her in her underwear. Still, the smacks continued to fall, and Diana wouldn't let up until she reached her goal: an apology! "Quite so! It seems I smacked you with more power than I intended, Ms. Quinn! You, however, Dr. Isley, are on the receiving end of a very controlled level of force! This is merely a tiny fraction of my strength! Were I to use even a quarter of it in full, it would likely maim you!"

That response brought some of the fight back into Harley. From the floor, she pointed a menacing finger in Wonder Woman's direction. "Bitch, you maim her and I'll slit your throat! Then I'll go to Themyscira and personally set fire to every single fucking plaid flannel shirt on the island! Then what will your people wear!?"

Wonder Woman paused in confusion. "I don't understand your nonsensical ramblings, Quinn! Why would we mourn the loss of several plaid flannel shirts?"

"Because... because... Ugh, okay, so can you just tell me if you're gay, or not? Because the other villains swear you are, and my gaydar is going fucking berserk right now, but if you don't get the whole thing about flannel shirts, then that kinda tells me you might not be. Aaaand you didn't really respond to the whole 'Isle of Lesbos' thing either. Also, do you think you could, like, let Ivy go? I think she gets the point. Her pants have been gone for a while, so... yeah." Harley attempted to pull herself to her feet to come to Ivy's rescue once more, making slight progress this time around. Standing hunched at the middle, she made eye contact with the Amazon. "And besides, this whole thing was my idea anyway so--oooooy gevalt, not ready to stand... I think I'm going to hurl..."

Wonder Woman gave Harley the courtesy of looking away as she vomited onto the floor. Her hand continued to collide with Ivy's cheeks, turning them bright green, which she supposed was her equivalent of red. "Get it out of your system, Quinn. After all, I'm going to be dealing with you momentarily! As for you, Poison Ivy. Have you anything to say?"

Nothing made a bad nightmare worse quite like having the seat of her pants literally smacked right off her, as was the case for poor Poison Ivy. Double embarrassing for her is that her lacey red panties were only meant for her girlfriend’s eyes, not for Diana’s! Plus… tight as her pants were, they at least provided SOME protection from Wonder Woman’s super-spanks. Now, she was taking each one in full, unaltered force… and oh, did they sting!

“H-Harles, love the enthusiasm - ow! Ow! - but can you maybe put it toward actually SAVING me?!” Ivy whined, her voice well blanketed beneath Harley and Diana’s conversation… plus, the impact of every smack across her blushing bottom. And then the sound of Harley throwing up. Everything was going wrong.

“Y-yeah? Fuck. You!” Ivy hissed back, her tongue not having much empathy for her bottom. “D-do you know how long it takes to grow these fuckin’ tights? A-am I supposed to walk home like this?!” She dared to ask.

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"Perhaps! And perhaps you should have thought of that before you decided to challenge a member of the Justice League!" At long last the smacks slowed. Wonder Woman still wanted an apology, but she knew it was likely these villains may choose death over humility. She wasn't out to cause them real harm for a simple misdemeanor.

"I hope this imparts a lesson about disturbing the peace, Dr. Isley. I won't have you wreaking havoc on my watch again, or I shall give you worse! Nearly every Amazon girl has the displeasure of experiencing the horrible sting of the olive tree switch at some point in her childhood, and from experience, I can attest that it is incredibly painful! If I catch you two rascals running amok again, I will share with you the full Amazon discipline experience!"

Diana unceremoniously pushed Ivy off of her lap and onto the floor. There was a red blur similar to the one she'd created upon entering, and when she came back into focus, Ivy was bound to the point of immobility by her Lasso of Truth. Wonder Woman clapped her hands together to represent a job well done before standing up to her full height, fists on her hips heroically.

"I believe you're next, Dr. Quinzel! Have you anything to say in your defense?"

"Y-yeah, the same thing I told all the nuns in Catholic school, actually: Get fucked, sister!"

It wasn’t long before green-tinted tears started to well up in Poison Ivy’s eyes. She never considered herself a show-off, but it was still more than a wound to her ego to be such a feared, respected villainess and yet helplessly sprawled over a stronger woman’s knee. The fact that her bottom was now deeply green beneath her red panties was all the more insult to injury. “Nggghh!” She whined aloud…

Until finally, she was dropped, shoved onto the floor onto her stomach. “Fuuuck!” She cried out, hitting the ground and letting loose two tears a piece. Her hand wasted no time falling back to massage her sore cheeks. “Fuck… ooh, that hurts, shit… Harles…” Ivy whined.

Unfortunately, her two arms were now in perfect position for a single bound of rope to tie her up. Before she could even blink, Ivy’s eyes opened and found herself tightly constricted via a golden rope. “Wh-?! Oh…” She grumbled. “A-are you shittin’ me…”

That left one Harley Quinn, without her superpowered girlfriend, a mere mortal (one with extreme dizziness, at that) up against the one and only Wonder Woman. Naturally, her words alone weren’t going to stop her. Diana’s brow dropped. “Mhm. Yes.” She sighed. Fast approaching Harley’s side, though, Wonder Woman seized her by the wrist, yanking her from the floor and thrusting her over her shoulder with a single bound. One hand on Harley’s back to keep her still, another patting her short-shorts.

“Run that infernal tongue of yours all you want! A thrashing, I’ve promised, and so I will deliver.” Diana ignored her captive’s squirming as she headed over toward Ivy’s bound body.

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"Fuck, you're tall. I'm like six and a half feet off the ground right now and it's making me... nauseous... gaaaah..." She suppressed a gag, willing herself not to throw up again, especially with her girlfriend under her, groaning in pain.

Her girlfriend! Once again, concern for her well-being lit a fire under Harley. "Ivy! Are you okay? I mean, I know you obviously aren't completely okay, that looked pretty painful, but you're not... 'maimed,' right? Not even partially?"

To her relief, Ivy looked to be intact. Harley knew it didn't fit Wonder Woman's MO to beat someone to the point of permanent bodily harm, especially after her whole hokey-ass spiel about "empathy," but she couldn't help but be anxious where her favorite person was concerned. "Ive... just hang tough, all right? You'll be okay..."

Though that wasn't to say she didn't have any anxiety left over to devote to her own plight! With Wonder Woman's rock-hard hand patting her shorts, she knew she was in for some serious pain. But at the moment, she was up the creek without a paddle (so to speak.) Between her disorientation and Wonder Woman holding her firmly in place (and Ivy down for the count) she was utterly fucked. All she could do was close her eyes, grit her teeth, and pray Wonder Woman was careful about that whole 'maiming' thing.

Ivy was not in the building at the moment. She was face down, ass up on the floor, her eyes still shut tight with a burning headache trying to register all that just happened. She hardly had time to care about Harley getting her turn… though yes, her girlfriend instincts told her to strike out at Wonder Woman, her sane self also knew Harley was in no danger. And that’d she’d lose that fight.

No, instead, Ivy was rather upset with Harley at the moment. “Harles… don’t… talk to me.” She hissed back.

“Hera, bless.” Wonder Woman scoffed to herself, nonchalantly propping up another knee that Harley would soon find herself thrown over. “It appears to me you two have some issues to sort out.” She commented rather bluntly, something Ivy merely scrunched her nose up at. “Worry not. Plenty of time for that after your proper discipline.”

“However…” Diana’s palm would come down, but rather than a painful strike, it was a mere two pats on both Harley’s cheeks in preparation. “I know from my previous experience with you two delinquints… Poison Ivy is rarely the leader. You, Harleen, are in for much more of a punishment than she!”

She proved as much with tight grip on Harley’s shorts, proving easy to slide straight down to her thighs before Diana’s thunderous palm raised to the air. “Prepare yourself!”

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"You really seem to be getting your jollies from patting my ass," Harley snorted, rolling her eyes before she could prevent herself. "Punishment for what, exactly? Busting the ceiling? Because with all the times Superman's probably crashed through it through it to save Lois Lane from getting a paper cut or some dumb shit, they're probably used to--"

CRAACK!

The first of what promised to be many hefty superhuman-strength spanks fell on her unprotected bottom, cutting her off mid sentence. Harley went even paler than usual, and then:

"...OWOWOWOW! What the SHIT!? Jesus FUCKING Christ, that hurt!! You must have taught in a Catholic school at some point or SOMETHING, because you seem like you know what the FUCK you're doing! I was here kinda thinking this might not be so bad because the nuns beat my ass like daily when I was a kid so I pretty much got used to it... and also because when Ivy and I do it in the bedroom it's super hot, but GOD was I off base!"

"..." There was a long silence from both Ivy and Wonder Woman as the two processed the information Harley had just volunteered of her own volition. The former psychiatrist frowned to herself, very unsure of why that statement had left her mouth. She wouldn't usually offer a superhero details about her sex life, would she? Probably not. And Ivy was likely even more mortified than before at the confession. So why had she done it?

"Uh... that's not to say all of what we do in the bedroom is kinky shit. I mean some of it is... okay, a lot of it is... but I also always tell Ivy I love her about twenty times while we're having sex and sometimes I even cry afterwards because I get so emotional..."

Harley was now experiencing a very different kind of vomit from what she'd experienced minutes ago: word vomit. And she couldn't stop it from coming up! She physically needed to say exactly what was on her mind, and she needed to say it exactly then and there! She was no longer in control of which thoughts she was verbalizing. If it was at the front of her mind, it was public knowledge. She tried with all her will to suppress it, keep it firmly inside, but it came out again and again like alcoholic bile during a nightmarish hangover!

"...Ah, so, uh, Wonder Woman could you maybe... give me an answer on the whole 'are you gay' thing from before? The truth is, I'm actually kind of stoked to find out Supergirl bats for our team, and always thought it would be kind of, well, cool if there were more LGBT superheroes and supervillains around, so... so... sooooo..."

SO what the FUCK is wrong with me!? I don't want to be saying any of this, so why the HELL am I doing it!?"

Wonder Woman’s hand dived down in a manner not unlike her invisible jet for a harsh blow across Harley’s bare butt! The resulting smack hard enough to send ripples through the clown girl’s bare bottom and draw squeals out of one even as sadistic as she. Diana’s brow furled as she nodded in approval of the first strike, her hand raising again to prepare for another…

All while Ivy winced. Yes, a certain part of her was happy to see Harley get a taste of what she WASN’T saving HER from, but it was never going to feel good to see her lover in pain! She tried budging from the tight grasps of the lasso as a result… but hell if this thing wasn’t tight.

It didn’t help that both she and Diana paused in surprise at Harley’s newest tangent.

“H-Harles?!” Ivy blinked in disapproval. If Harley wants to humiliate herself in front of Wonder Woman, she’s free to do so, but now she’s bringing HER into it?! “Shut up, Harles!” Ivy demanded, trying to slip free from her own constraints again only to find them tight as ever. Diana’s stare stayed as confused as ever, weary that this may be one of the two girl’s plan to distract her…

‘Til she noticed the real reason; part of her trusty lasso was circled around Harley’s leg. “Ah! Ms. Quinzel, you’ve been caught under the wrap of my trusty lasso. It compels you to tell no mistruth!” Diana explained, though didn’t let that stop her from resuming her pattern-like spanking of Harley’s exposed cheeks, each one a blistering smack to brighten up her pale butt. “And quite a few skeletons in one’s closet, you do have…” She giggled to herself.

Ivy’s pupils narrowed in fear of what was coming next… because she ALSO was confined by the whip. “So, lest we discuss my own preferences any further…” Wonder Woman chuckled, barely audible between the impacts of her Amazonian palm across Harley’s ass and the latter’s squeals. “I think some proper questioning is in order… like…”

“I’m gonna kill everyone and then myself.” Ivy muttered to herself. “Who exactly pulls the proverbial strings in the bedroom, Ms. Quinn?” Wonder Woman just had to know.

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"YEOOOWCH! OWW! God DAMN it!!" The sting was unlike anything she'd ever experienced, and showed no signs of stopping soon! She thought of herself as fairly tough when it came to dealing with physical pain (sadly, she'd developed that skill during her years with the Joker) but she'd never had someone with such strength lay a hand on her. It was excruciating!

"Ughhh... just my lu--OWW!" she groaned then yelped when Wonder Woman revealed that for the next few minutes, she'd be unable to lie and then subsequently smacked her with enough force to send her flying from her lap. "Oh God, please don't let this go where I think it's about to go..." she thought to herself. As her luck would have it, that's exactly where it went immediately! Of course, Wonder Woman dodged her question and mounted one of her own. And a very personal one at that.

"'Proverbial strings?' Is that your way of asking me which one of us wears the strap-on, or just who wears it figuratively!? Because I'll have you know that's none of your damned business! ...And... And..." The word vomit resumed. "...Aaaand also that it's Ivy on both counts! I mean, we take turns doing each other and everything, but I really kind of prefer her being 'on top' in both ways, if you know what I mean? This is gonna sound weird AF, but when I was with Joker, the ass-clown always wanted me to top him, if you can believe that. Sicko got his rocks off having me beat him to a pulp and ordering him around, which I know sounds made-up, but it's not like I can LIE right now, fuck you very much! And you know what? I was never into it, not one bit! Ivy is great about taking charge, and I love it, but sometimes I wish she'd do it even more..."

What felt like a hot iron being smacked across Harley’s ass was more of a gentle swing of the hand for Diana; it was all almost relaxing, in fact! “Ah… is this not much better than fighting like savages?” She giggled to herself, to which Ivy groaned “Uh, no?”

The question lay on the table. Ivy’s eyes shrunk and stared straight at Harley… shaking her head as the only communication she’d give. All she had to do was not talk! If she didn’t open her mouth, no truths could come out of it… and she was off to such a good start, too. “Yeah, fuck off!” Ivy added after. Until that cursed word came out of Harley’s mouth; ‘and.’ “No. No ‘and,’ Harles. Stop.”

Harles did not stop.

“Harley-Harley!-HARLEY.” Too late. Harley’s ass was spared from another smack just long enough to Wonder Woman to cover her mouth to hide her laughing. “Aha! Ah! Oh…” Diana shook her head. Then, got right back to smacking Harley’s butt with particularly hard strike of her hand. “It sounds to me like your private life is not so fulfilled as Harley might wish. Isley, what say you?”

“No, no, don’t bring me into thi-iIIS…” Ivy tried her hardest, but the lasso constricted around her and forced her teeth to grit hard. “IIIii constantly feel under pressure to perform in the bedroom but I’m not always comfortable being the domme! Sometimes, I feel like it’d really help me relieve my anxieties if Harley took over more often but I haven’t trusted myself enough to tell her that, because I think she feels the same way!” She grunted. “Aggghh! I hate this!”

“She also jokes all the time about using my vines during sex, and I always laugh it off or act disgusted, but sometimes I think it COULD work if the plants were okay with it? Fuck! Stop it!” Ivy hissed, unable to take it anymore as she bit down on the lasso and began to pull up, trying to rip it off her with her teeth. “Ahaha…” Diana shook her head, one final hard smack to Harley Quinn’s ass before unceremoniously dropping her off her knee.

“Try as you might, the golden lasso won’t break for you. But, fear not, your nefarious efforts today were not in vain. Hear how much you’ve learned about each other, you were unwilling to tell before!” Wonder Woman proudly announced. “Now, tell me, before I let you go…”

“Ah, shit…” Muffled by the whip in Ivy’s mouth preceded Diana before she gave the lasso another pull, forcing the two to tell the truth again; “Was you two’s spankings more punishment than pleasure?”

“FFFUCK!” Ivy groaned with a hiss, “Y-yes, it hurts like shit when you do it, but I also might like trying it with Harley sometime-fuck-get this shit OFF me!”