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**XiaolinLilith** · May 26th, 2008, 03:17 AM

"Ian, what's got into you?" Lydia asked politely, over the phone. She looped the curly black telephone wire around one finger and sighed. She had been seeing less and less of her 15-year-old, redheaded sweetheart, Ian, as of late, and she was beginning to worry.

Lydia hoped he wasn't getting ready to break her heart. After all, she was just a lonely little British girl over in the States--and she was a little on the nerdy side at that. When she had met Ian, sweet and brainy, they had hit it off right away--he'd bring her issues of Popular Science home from his dad's work, smuggled under his gray wool coat. But even though he'd been incredibly loyal to bespectacled little Lydia at first, he was beginning to stay away more and more, avoiding her at school and in their neighborhood.

This was all fine and dandy when he'd first started. I suppose a boy needs his space...but later, Lydia was wondering if he needed that much space. And now, here she sat, in the parlor of their house, on the phone, hoping he wasn't going to leave for good...

**Peeker** · May 26th, 2008, 03:28 AM

"What's gotten into me? Nothing, Lydia - you're imaginin' things, honestly, there isn't a thing getting into me, all's as it has been - why would you think something was wrong?"

Ian, speaking as loudly as he dared into the phone, was sweating bullets. He couldn't help but feel bad for doing what he was, but he just didn't know how else to tell Lydia what was wrong. How could he say something like that to her? No, it'd be far better if he just gave her space, and let her drift off. She was such a smart girl - she'd not only figure it out, she'd no doubt find someone else to care about.

How could he tell her how embarrassed he felt, how he thought about her so much, how he couldn't get it out of his mind? It had to be bad for him, had to be unnatural... there was nothing he'd read or studied that had said a thing about it -- not that he was quite so studious (he thought himself a bit of a slouch compared to Lydia) as he might be, no, but there just wasn't an explanation for it.

Being with Sally-Ann was the only way to break him of it, and as much as he hated to hurt Lydia, he knew- he had to do it.

"I mean, oh, come on, Lyd- what should I do, hm? How can I make it clearer to you if you're so... so concerned?"

The boy's eyes widened, and he turned away from the phone. Now he'd done it. She was a smart girl. It wouldn't take much more than such a bothered tone of voice as that one he'd just given to give her the hint. She'd know. She'd know! ...oh, he couldn't listen to her cry, he just couldn't! Couldn't dare think to make her sad! Why else would he be torturing both of them like this, being so careful, being so patient, giving her the space to make the break herself?

"I..." the boy's voice caught. What could he say? Goodbye? Forever? He loved her - he couldn't lie to her... but he just couldn't stay, either....

What to do?!

His mouth moved in the motions to say 'goodbye, Lyd' but no sound came out. He patted his brow with a handkerchief and sighed into the reciever. His hand moved to start hanging up the phone, and he was all stuck in starts and stops. What was he gonna do?!

**XiaolinLilith** · May 26th, 2008, 03:42 AM

There's something IN that voice! Oh, geez, he DID do it, didn't he...please, don't let this be true!

She got the quaver out of her voice and spoke again, her accent really coming out with her stress. "Might it be that you are fancying someone else? Or am I wrong?" Lydia was indeed about to cry--especially if it was that popular little Sally-Ann (what in the WORLD did he see in HER anyway?!) Another curl of the wire around her finger and another tear blinked back.

"If you were lying to me about being out with your friends all this time, I will be so mad..." Her voice trembled again. "I don't like being lied to, Ian! You ought to know by now!" The little Black Forest cuckoo clock on the wall struck 5:00, and Lydia's schnauzer came wandering into the room, wondering what was wrong. "Just tell me the truth...don't keep me wondering..."

**Peeker** · May 26th, 2008, 03:48 AM

"I.... Lydia...." the boy bit his lip. His hand was shaking.

He couldn't. He just couldn't.

"I'll see you soon, Lydia. Have-- have a good night..."

No! How-- how stupid! Not 'see you soon' - he couldn't do that! No! No, no, no! With a strangled groan, the young man hung up the phone, and paced away. What was he going to do? How could he -- could he really just cheat... he- he hadn't quite cheated. Not yet. Not wholly... he hadn't kissed her, hadn't but held Sally's hand...

But he was avoiding Lydia. He was afraid to go any further. He did want her to break it off because he didn't want to see her get hurt.

He just didn't know what to do.

The boy pulled on his peacoat and reached for his hat. "D' you need me to get anything at the store, ma? I - I'm goin' out for some air!"

No answer. Just as well. Checking to make sure his key was in his pocket, Ian closed the door, ran down the stoop, and headed down the street to think and clear his head.

What was he going to do about Lydia? ....what was she going to do about him?

**XiaolinLilith** · May 26th, 2008, 04:04 AM

Lydia hung up and let out a long sigh. "Binky, he makes me want to tear my hair out..." She picked up the schnauzer pup and cradled him in her arms. "If he shows up later, he'll catch it for sure..." Lydia carried the dog to the kitchen with her and opened a tin of some expensive dog food her dad insisted on buying, then sat it on the floor in front of Binky and went to heat up last night's leftover roast for her dad and little brother, who was over at his best friend's house. Let's hope they keep their distance tonight.

After she put the roast on, she headed back to her room and dug through her color-coded wardrobe, finally deciding on a pale yellow dress and white sweater. I'll make myself as pretty as possible so he WON'T want to leave me...She cleaned the specks off her glasses and threw on a string of pearls.

And back again to the parlor. Lydia realized how much she was wandering, and decided to quit for a while and play the piano. She lit a fire--just enough to warm the room nicely--and sat on the bench, beginning a little waltz.

**Peeker** · May 26th, 2008, 04:26 AM

The boy walked around the block, down the street, through the park, and past all the various shops and stalls closing up, hawking their last bits, and looking for final customers. He felt guiltier than he could say when he saw the flower stall. And guiltier still when he didn't buy anything at it.

He wasn't going to see Lydia, he told himself.

As he walked past town-hall, and looked at the great clock in the center of it, he reminded himself he had hours before dinner, and just as much time before Lydia's father would be home. She'd be nearly alone, if not with only her brother, or perhaps Binky to keep her company. She wasn't one for too many day-visits with people.

But he wasn't going to visit her.

He still went down Oakshot Lane, Lydia's street, because there was a lovely little sweet shop on the far end. He'd taken Lydia there before.

Maybe he'd take Sally next week. But he wasn't going to visit Lydia.

When he passed by her house, he heard piano music. Ian sat down heavily on the girl's stoop, his face buried in his hands. No. he wasn't going to visit. He wasn't going to call on her. They were done! They were finished!

He wasn't going to see her cry. Wasn't, couldn't, didn't, wouldn't!

She was so pretty. He did such awful, strange things to her. He couldn't risk it, dare it... couldn't just couldn't...

Ian pulled his hat off of his head and twisted it between his hands. Loitering here just wasn't going to do anything, but he couldn't bring himself to move - not down the lane, not back home, and certainly not up the stairs. ...because he wasn't going to call on Lydia! He'd decided!

Right?

**XiaolinLilith** · May 26th, 2008, 04:13 PM

As the piano music faded, Lydia found herself growing more and more restless. "Since Dad and Rudy never bother to water the windowboxes..."

She began pacing again, across the worn pink carpet to the yellow-tiled kitchen, where she found the watering can and filled it up, while Binky barked at the sound of the faucet--the dog had always hated water.

"Alright now, hush that yapping, the water's off," Lydia said crossly, over at the window Ian was sitting under. She pushed open the shutters and slid up the spotlessly clean pane--and who did she see but her wandering Romeo?

"Well hello there...and just what are you doing here, mister?" Lydia began drenching the zinnias in tap water. "You were gonna try to break it off with me, weren'tcha?" There. She had decided to be blunt, and if he didn't like it, well...he could just deal with it, 'cause there was a lot worse that she could do--letting her dad know, for one!!

**Peeker** · May 27th, 2008, 12:33 AM

The boy looked up at Lydia with surprise, turning and standing, hand still twisted between his hands. Head and eyes raised to meet her gaze from higher-up in the windowsill, he couldn't answer her. He swallowed hard, pushing down his guilt, and took a few steps up the stoop, to be even with her.

"...can I come in then, Lyd?' the boy asked, voice trying to stay firm. "I-- I know that y' wanted to talk, so..." he shook his head. "I couldn't keep away." His eyes found the string of pearls around her neck, and he gave a little smile at her fairness, despite himself. He tightened his hands into fists, fighting the urge to give in, to go in that direction - he couldn't lose himself to it again! This had to be done!

There was crying to be had. Fine, then. He'd pull no punches. He'd make her cry, if that was what he had to do for both their sakes.

**XiaolinLilith** · May 27th, 2008, 10:09 AM

"Fine then, come in..." She had to restrain herself from dumping the can's leftover contents all over his head. "Meet me in the parlor, dear..." The window was closed and locked. Binky continued to bark at Ian, as if he knew his mistress's anger at the boy.

But Lydia wasn't in the parlor yet. She was in her room once again, looking for something else--and she found it. The lovely maple hairbrush her father had given her for her 15th birthday. Perfect. And back down the stairs to the parlor, pushing open the French doors and sitting down on the flowered couch again...

**Peeker** · May 27th, 2008, 10:20 AM

Not having any real choice in the matter, Ian quietly made his way into the parlor, and sat uncomfortably on Lydia's rather comfortable couch, frowning at Binky, the barky little mongrel that he was. Yes, even the dog was accusing him of doing wrong when he was trying to do what was best, and there was no way around it. The boy heard Lydia come into the room, but didn't stand - rather, he kept his eyes on the space between his feet, and sighed. When she joined him on the couch - he felt the weight - there was a little spark of hope. At least she wasn't staying on the other side of the room as though he had the plague.

"I suppose its best if we talk about it like this. I'm sorry, Lydia, I really am... will y' hear me out, at least?"

But he didn't raise his eyes yet. He wanted to make this as easy as possible on the girl, so he was sure to take his time, to be careful, to go no faster than she would be okay with. It was the least he could do!